ChaosHappinessBookMama

⭐⭐.5 A woman struggles with balancing her family's needs when secrets are finally brought in the open.  Heidi's beloved husband, Johnny, has a fatal heart attack while out on a job. He has a draft message on his phone to Heidi - q picture of the street shortly before he breathed his last breath.  Heidi is convinced Johnny was sending her one last message. She struggles to find the meaning - until she finds a man who is the spitting image of her husband.   Heidi needs to decide how much to share with her daughters.  When seeking advice from her mother,  Rosalind shares her own dark secret.  I felt for Heidi as she tried to save everyone around her - William,  her son,  dealing with addiction, struggling to be a father. Her daughters' anger and grief. Her own half sister.  A lot going on in this book. And it just kind of ended without any resolution.  They are all on their way,  but it felt as though it was all swept under the ru...

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Funny.  Smart. Quick enjoyable read.   Jodie moves back to her hometown, Cornwall. After a tense situation, Jodie promises her daughter,  Daisey, to leave the police. After finishing chef college,  Jodie buys a house and they move.  Shortly after her return,  Jodie runs into her long time friend, Tony. He's about to be married, but the caterer bailed. Jodie gets a job - and a mystery to solve.  The morning of the wedding,  Tony's ex-wife is found murdered and no one can find the bride.   Determined to prove Tonya innocence, Jodie works the case,  much to DCI Withers' chagrin.  Great, loveable characters.  Romantic tension. Family love.  Great read.

⭐⭐⭐ In an effort to recover from caring for her ailing mother, long struggle with cancer, Brynn visits an old friend. Brynn stays at the town's small bed and breakfast - it has the feel of a home rather than hotel.  She becomes fast friends with the owner and staff as well as the other lodgers, including Dominic.  Dominic is covered in tattoos, obvious mention of Bradbury's classic The Illustrated Man. To add to his mystery,  Kate - Brynn's long time friend, mentions her police chief husband has investigated Dominic in relation to a suspicious death.  Brynn learns Dominic's career is assisting people with transition.  Not only does this resonate with Brynn but also Alice, the ex wife of a happily married gay man. Alice suffers from dementia,  seemingly straddling the veil between here and the after life.  There is a lot in this book.  Sacrifice to care for one's family. Self care. Death. Rebirth.   It was an interesting read....

⭐⭐⭐⭐ On her 62 birthday,  Olivia learns the truth about her life.  After a morning of lovemaking with her husband, Olivia goes to her family law office to finalize the sale of her practice.  She has dreamed of this for years - finally able to travel with Richard, a very successful lawyer as well.  Olivia opens an email, watches the attached video and her world collapses.   The body of Richard's secretary and lover is found. Olivia is charged with murder and placed on house arrest. With the help of her lawyer and his investigator,  Olivia fights to prove her innocence.   I have been looking forward to reading this book - it did not disappoint.  Fast paced plot. Great twists. Family drama. Strong female investigator.  Culprit was easy to identify  - still finished and loved it. 

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Rebecca is covering a demonstration; the local council want to place a sex offender, caught with child porn on his computer,  in a neighborhood nicknamed the Ferry. Mo Burke, the matriarch ruling her family's crime business, fronts the demonstration.  A local candidate,  super conservative and racist attends.  While talking with Cruz, freelance photographer, they receive a tip about a murder.  DCI Roache is called to handle the case. A man dressed in traditional highland dress, murdered with historical sword. No leads. No identity.  Rebecca teams up with her previous boss, Elsbeth to investigate this murder. She befriends a historical consultant for a movie being filmed.  Meanwhile Rebecca has caught the attention of the oldest Burke son. Though he has taken part in his family's business,  Nolan wants out.  I could not put this book down. The characters.  Plot. Suspense.  Twists. Loved it. Highly recommend. ...

⭐⭐⭐ Mabel runs the diner and motel in a small town. A single mother raising two boys and her neice - both parents dead. She is certainly struggling but helps all those she can.  Over the years, it's been overcome with drugs and racists.  Mabel hates seeing her community failing each other as Larson,  the leader of the drug trade and racists, continues to run things. He has people on his payroll - the state police, business owners, etc.  A young couple enter Maybel's dinner,  clearly in love, having an argument.  The young woman is found brutally murdered.  The young black man arrested and assumed guilty.  Mabel knows he's innocent - she struggles to find anyone to believe him, no one willing to investigate the murder. She begins her own investigation - quickly on the bad sad of Larson.  Courage. Integrity.  Mabel fights for what she believes,  providing a struggling town with an exemplary example of what a woman can accomplish....

Erica and her bestie Tish take their children to the neighborhood pool to swim, cool off and watch the annual Fourth of July fireworks.  It's an annual event well attended by the neighborhood,  including the wealthy Sabine, Carol and Monika. After sharing a weird look, Sabine leaves the pool. Shortly after her husband,  Mark, arrives. Looking for Sabine. He goes home only to find the back door broken, blood and Sabine missing.   A whirlwind of activity and confessions ensue, including an online poll for the likelihood of Sabine still being alive.  Tish and Erica have their own secrets,  closely guarded but about to pull them into the investigation.   Slow burn plot. Good twists. I loved the women's solidarity and friendships,  support and kindess. 

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ I truly enjoyed revisiting this classic. Of course I read it in high school - one of the first books to be picked apart; symbolism,  foreshadowing,  wealth,  status.   Twenty years later and for the purpose of leisure certainly lent a different perspective.   I am left with the concept of stunted growth.  Gatsby spending years to mass a fortune worthy of Daisy's attention. Tom climaxed in college with his football career, everything else just a disappointment.  Myrtle suffers from boredom and withers in her husband's garage.  A golf pro who constantly lies - stuck in an adolescent phase, spurning love affairs.  Shakespeare tragedy in the 1920's. The affects of returning from The War to End All Wars lurks in the background. Nick, our narrator, feels his hometown is too small, too isolated after seeing war, Europe, death. He is the catalyst, sparks the pinnacle and tragedy of Gatsby's life.  The waste of wealth ...

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Chilling. Addictive.   Sarah and Adam are about to celebrate their tenth wedding anniversary.  Sarah, a successful defense attorney,  bails on their plans for quiet time at their lake house, forced to prepare for a high profile trial.  Adam goes along- to meet up with his mistress,  Kelly. She is also married - to an abusive man who terrifies her. Later that night, Adam leaves the lake house. The next day, he is taken into custody as a suspect in Kelly's vicious murder.   Sarah takes on Adam's case, desperate to prove his innocence.   Countless what just happened moments. I couldn't stop listening.  Though I figured out the culprit, I finished this audiobook truly enjoying the chilling twists.   Narration performed by excellent performers. Very enjoyable. 

⭐⭐ After a work event, Daisey goes home only to be attacked by what the public is calling The Rose Petal Ripper. Dan abandons the remainder of his paternity leave to return to his investigative team.  Upon her return home,  Daisey takes on a roommate,  Iris. They work together,  around the same age and single.  Insight into the killer is shared - a young woman gives birth to twons. But Tracey becomes obsessed with her son - telling anyone who will listen he is evil.  This book sucked me in from the beginning but quickly lost my interest. Predictable.

⭐⭐ This is an amazing and honest look at motherhood as well as impacts on all aspects of a woman's life. We do lose a sense of self - which is a huge component of depression, in my opinion.  Beth is struggling - Joe who is an amazing baby doesn't sleep. At all. On top of the after baby bulge society feels is supposed to disappear over night. Breastfeeding - constant eating, leaking from everywhere and how do you function with their size. No social interaction - utter lose of socialization, support structure. The house is a disaster - who can keep up with anything with minimal assistance from the dad?  I felt all of these aspects of Beth's life - from my own experiences, struggles and the reality of motherhood. However, I just could not get into this book. The lengthy descriptions. Long chapters. It just didn't work for me.  

⭐⭐⭐ After a flu epidemic killed one out of three people, America disbanded. People were married at 16, 17 - with the intention of repolulating. A wife was given a year or two,  sometimes less, sometimes more - to become pregnant and give birth. If not, they were kicked out of the marriage; mostly accused of witchcraft when women had miscarriages,  still births. Either jail, convents or death by hanging awaited these women. Ada is the daughter of Fairchild's well respected midwife. At 17, Ada marries. After a year,  no pregnancy and Ada returns home only to be accused of witchcraft by her closest friends.  Her mother sends her to a convent. Ada finds her purpose by copying books to exchange with the bookseller.  Medical books.  Midwife - women's medical care.  Asa decides the convent life is not for her,  and seeks The Hole in the Wall Gang.  Not only does this book yet again remind us women are valued for reproduction, not their c...

⭐⭐ Narrator - Excellent voice and accent though at times could be monotone. Inflections and alterations for characters were great. Kieran returns home after many years - his father's dementia is progressing, forcing his mother to sell the family home and place him in care. Kieran returns with Mia, a young woman also from same coastal town, though her family moved shortly after a devastating storm.  Years prior a storm changed many lives. Kieran's older brother and several of his friends drowned while saving Kieran; Gabby, a fourteen year old girl, was never found though her backpack washed up on shore. The town, the families have struggled to find closure, peace since the tragedy. Kieran and Mia reconnect with friends, skirting around memories. Until Bree is found murdered - it all goes back to that storm. What really happened? Who is lying?  This story is a slow build; lots of background, character development and a slow pace. Though I enjoyed the ending, I just wanted the bo...

⭐⭐⭐ A group of friends from university spend a weekend at Amy's cottage to celebrate her birthday. It has been fifteen years since they have returned. The suicide of their friend Hannah caught them off guard, causing them to not return.  Louise is the narrator, with some excerpts from when Hannah was missing. Louise and her husband, Theo,  are trying to work past his affair with a coworker.   Amy arranges a weekend for the group to stay at her Aunt's cottage- not far from Hannah's suicide. Kat, Daisy and Louise wish to not attend- to keep their secrets close. Amy wants them to say goodbye to Hannah, open up about their feelings and memories. Until they are told Hannah's death has been ruled a homicide.   Quick and easy read. Somewhat predictable, decent twist at the ending. 

Rowan wrote a true crime novel - celebrated by the critics, but a commercial flop.  An online troll targets Rowan and causes massive damage to his hands.  Rowan moves in with his sister, her wife and daughter for convalescence. He hears a story about three young teenage girls disappear into the woods - found days later. Rowan smells a story.   The narrative is Rowan struggling to heal,  combating alcoholism,  despair and self loathing. It also flashes back to the 1980s, when Violet and Catherine were students at the new age school Silver Birch.  It is a long book - could crop some repetitive areas, etc. I liked the twists.  Rowan's drive to discover what was hidden, his budding relationship with his niece, Snowdrop, his reconnecting with family and determining who he wants to be. Intriguing mystery. 

Someone uses St Joe's student list serve to email the entire student body explicit pictures of seven female students - all of which are over the age of 18. There is no legal recourse - the police aren't interested. The school's administration downplays the seriousness of the situation to deter donations - the bulk of the student body are children of wealthy families. The administration offers walk-in counseling to those impacted, not just the seven young women. They want to push it away as quietly as possible, regardless of the impact on their students.  Eden is assigned this story from her Editor in Chief, Ronnie. Eden tries to interview the young women, though many just want to hide in a corner. But not Sloane - Sloane has been very open with her sexuality, living her life on her terms with confidence. Eden becomes driven to represent the voices of these young women. Slowly they build trust - allowing Eden to hear their feelings, life long impacts on their young lives, al...

My current read- Revenge of the Sluts.  An email is sent to a private school of wealthy students - several girls exposed, all over the age of 18.  I'm 30% in - Eden, a school newspaper editor, interviews the victims.  Their school is offering little in terms of support.  All of the victims are over 18 - the police don't seem to care.  This story's relevance to not only victims hiding , desperate to be invisible but also the lack of concern is shameful, unacceptable. 

3.5 Hannah has dreamed of owning a holiday rental - she and her husband, Daniel, renovate their barn in the same style as the house. Hannah buys the furniture, all the loving touches. After a successful first week of rental, the next family moves in - Mike, Nadia and Kayleigh. And the nightmare begins.  After several days and consistent drinking, Mike falls on the patio - breaking his ankle. Hannah struggles to meet their unrealistic demands in the hopes of avoiding a bad review. Meanwhile, Hannah's marriage is under stress. Daniel works out of town most weekdays, returning home on the weekends. He is degrading, mean and intolerant to Hannah while attempting to spend time with his family.  This book was a slow build - the ongoing issues with the renters, Daniel's disgusting behavior, I wasn't sure where the plot was going. It certainly was a surprise. The remainder of the book flew by.

This book broke my heart into a million pieces.  Then broke it again. I love this family. This family of Cherokee traditions and stories.  This family of family abuse. This family of three sisters.  Betty is one of six surviving children.  After years of traveling the country,  her parents decide to return to Ohio.  Betty starts school - harassed, tormented,  bullied.  But she is rich in family. Her father's love, his stories give her a foundation, an identity.  Her sisters and brothers imagination, connection, bravery. Her mother always a mystery - depression,  mood swings and life.  I cried so many times reading this family history. Their tragedies.  Their reality.  I cannot celebrate this author's bravery enough. Her family's bravery and honesty.   Trigger warning - sexual abuse. 

OH MY GOODNESS! Jennifer Snow liked my Goodreads Review of her book Housewife Chronicles.  Swoon. 

Betty- my current read.  Betty is one of 8 children,  6 survived, born to a white woman and a Cherokee man.  The family moves around until Betty is 6 - they return to Ohio to settle in an abandoned home. The owners had disappeared- leaving eight bullet holes in the walls - one for each family member.  This is story about family history- a father passing down the stories of his ancestors; a mother suffering from severe depression.  Betty struggles to find her own place- bullied and tormented in school.  Lyrical. Poetic. Heart crushing. Sucked me right in. 

Housewife Chronicles  Jennifer Snow  ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ #NetGalley  #housewifechronicles This is women's fiction at it's best.  Two weeks after Beth learns of her husband's affair with the young, sexy yoga instructor living next door, he's dead. With an erection.  Beth is trying to keep it together- her kids are lying; her creativity is dead. Thank goodness for her coffee club- neighborhood women meeting weekly to gossip.   Gina is utterly devastated.  As the other woman, obviously she lacks the community's support- she's adrift.  Her twin brother,  Gino, stays for a few weeks to lend support and guidance.  Then Howard's death is ruled a homicide.  Told from both Beth and Gina's point of view helped not only define both characters but also add suspense to the mystery of Howard's death. Women uplifting women,  providing support and humor.   Great read. Highly recommend.  

2.5 Rounded up I was provided with a free ARC from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.   Everly has a long history of horrifying birthdays. Turning 30 is no exception. After walking in on her boyfriend and his assistant in bed, Everly heads to work.  Stacey, her bff and deejay Everly produces,  intends to sing happy birthday.  Instead Everly recaps her ending relationship.  Chris, radio station manager, sends her home.  And the idea of a dating gane featuring Everly is born.   Everly and Chris have major chemistry- as they work closely on this project,  they can't help but feel the sparks.  This is a cute romance with a clear ending. I loved Everly's very clear criteria,  her openness regarding anxiety and other possible hindrances to her participation.  Chris not only accepts these but builds her dates to ensure her comfort.  Swoon. 

Modern retelling of Bronte classic Jane Eyre.  Jane is a 23 year old woman running from her past - foster homes,  neglect,  vigilance.   She moves to Birmingham, renting a room from John - a kid she met in care.  Jane is a dog walker in a neighborhood dripping with money, looking for her next step up. In walks Eddie Rochester. Wealthy widower, sexy, down to earth - but Jane doesn't know his wife is still alive. And is locked upstairs.   This novel is an intriguing spin on a beloved classic - I loved it. The drama. Neighborhood snotty women. Jane's attempt to recreate herself, gain wealth and status.  Highly recommend.   picture from Goodreads 

This book sucked me in from the start.  Gabby is home alone - her parents are on a trip.  After working at the bar and drinks with friends after her shift, Gabby goes home. Something feels off. Then he comes out of the shadows. Morgan, Ben, Amy and their team investigate this brutal murder.  The killer uses Gabby's phone to text Morgan. DNA results come back - showing a link to an incarcerated killer.   Meanwhile Morgan is working on her relationship with Stan, her father. He has been sober for weeks, AA meetings, keeping his apartment tidy.   The suspense and twists were great.  Excellent plot. Highly recommend.

This book broke my heart. So many stereotypes- teachers clearly racist,  sharing with their classes.  Mothers and babies.  A week before Thanksgiving,  four friends hop in the truck and search for elk. They've been seen - on the sacred land dedicated to the Elders. Regardless,  the young men find the herd and lead them off the cliff; a practice from the time of their ancestors.  Yet one young cow refuses to give up. After multiple shots and knife wounds, she finally succumbs.  Lewis realizes she is pregnant- a mother protecting her baby.  One by one she comes the young men.  The poor conditions of the reservations.  The racism of teachers and classmates.  The life already carved out - one path filled with jail, drugs,  addiction,  hopelessness.   These stories are important reminders of those our society,  government have deserted.